Tiny ideals

      My first apartment was a tiny efficiency. I was advised by my grandmother to look for any defects in the apartment and bring them to the landlord’s attention, so that they could be repaired, before I signed a lease.
       One of the things she told me to look for were mouse holes. I knew I was going to take the apartment anyway, but I was relieved that after a thorough examination, there were no mouse holes. One day, after work, I lie down in my very own place, in my very own bed and took a nap. When I woke, there was a mouse staring at me from a triangular crack between the wall and the floor. I was confused. That can’t be a mouse hole. When I scanned my mind for what I expected a mouse hole to look like, I found a perfectly arched doorway, like the ones I’d seen as a child on Tom and Jerry. I laughed at myself but felt alarm too.
      I went to an academically renowned high school. Despite my attitude shift and slipping grades in junior year, I managed to secure a full scholarship for college (which I declined). I thought, ‘ I’m smart.’ How did that idea from a cartoon survive in my head? Then it dawned on me; it had survived because I had no information to the contrary. That shook me. How many more ideas are there in my head that are unfounded yet never contradicted? How many times had I looked right past a friend, a mentor, an opportunity, a talent, all because my reference was limited ?  One would think this realization would have sent me running to the nearest university. But as far as I was concerned, the text books were filled with cartoon mouse holes.